If I Could Turn Back The Clock

By Rosita Madrid Sanchez

I would like to share with you the true story of my friend Cecil. Cecil and I met in the HOME Academy where we were both studying in a cooking class.

Cecil is a typical Pinay lady; not so tall, curly hair, and a loud voice as if she is always angry with someone. It sounds like she is shouting even when she is just talking naturally. I found this strange, so I talked to her, saying: ‘Ssssh lower your voice, we are in the classroom, not at the market.’ Cecil just gave me a smile in return.

Days past, and when we were in final grading, the teacher put us in the same group. We were in charge of making Thai food. They asked me to be the leader of the group, and Cecil was assigned vice-president. While I was giving tasks to everyone and we discussed all the dishes, Cecil was very interested. After that, we became friends.  True friends; we talked, we laughed, and finally graduation came but even after we finished the course our friendship kept rolling until now.

One day my phone rang at 9:30 am, it was an unregistered number. I hesitated to answer because if the number was not in my contacts. But that day I had the courage to answer the unfamiliar number.

‘Hello? Hello?’ I heard.
‘Rose?’  It was a voice from a lady, and she was crying
‘Cecil?’ I answered. I knew her instantly even though she was whispering.
‘What’s wrong? What’s going on?’
‘I’m going home,’ she answered finally.
I was in shock, what had happened? I needed an explanation.
That morning, Cecil and her employer went to the doctor for a check up because she had some rashes on her skin, and had not been able to sleep well. The doctor told her employer: ‘Please send her home now.’
I did not get any more answers that day, but I suggested my friend to runaway and ask for help. The next morning she called me again.

‘Rose, I am at the airport. My employer is with me, and I have some money to use for medication.’
What could I say? I only said: ‘Please keep in touch. I love you.’

Cecil answered: ‘I will miss you.’

Two days later I noticed she was online, so I sent her a message:
‘Hey Cecil, how are you?’ This is the answer I got.
‘Rose, my eyesight is getting dark, I can’t see properly anymore. My body has started shaking, and I am not able to stand or to walk without any help from others. Both my kidneys have failed to function, the only answer is a transplant and dialysis, so my life can be extended for a year, for a month, for a week, nobody knows. You know what, my own silence killed me. Until I started crying, and I did not even care anymore whether my employer was around. I just felt as if one part of my body was totally gone, it was so painful. Why is this happening so fast, why? Rose, if I could turn back the time, to when I first started to get headaches, and could not sleep well. To when I first noticed my stomach bloating, even tough my appetite had disappeared. This was the time that I should have told my employer I needed to see a doctor. But I ignored my body. It is all my own fault, I was only thinking about the need to earn money, I was only thinking of others, I never thought about myself. I had never thought I was already so sick. Now I am already at the last chapter of my life. Thank you Rose, for being my friend. And till we meet again!’

I think it is important at this point to emphasize to my fellow domestic workers that we only have one body, and one life. I know we always like to think that we are strong, and that we can’t afford to feel anything when we are working. But what about our future? We need to be sensitive and pay attention to our health and our body. Because we can never turn back the clock.

To my friend Cecil, I have no words to express how sad I am that I cannot be on your side right now, the moment that you really need me. But I am happy that you are with your family and loved ones. From the moment I met you until forever, I won’t forget you. I love you.